BLURB:
The
Blessing of Self -Acceptance
I
decided to write my memoir when I reached my mid-eighties. Given the gift of
longevity, I felt a strong need to review my life openly and to recall both the
joyful moments as well as the days and nights of feeling anguish and
hopelessness. Highlighting events and experiences in my life has given me the
opportunity to better understand the emotional and physical cost over the years
of denying the person I am and the pain of self-rejection.
Excerpt:
My parents
grew up in very different families. My paternal grandparents immigrated to
America from the Ukraine when my father was only a year old. Grandma Sonia had
been a victim during a pogrom and through the efforts of a cousin living in the
United States, the family was able to come to America and settle in Chicago.
Jonathan
holds a Ph.D. from the University of Illinois and was trained to serve both as
a teacher and administrator providing guidance to staff and to children and
adolescents with identified emotional disturbance and behavior disorders. He
has served as a consultant to differing programs in both public and private
school settings and was the director of a high school off-campus learning
center serving students who required part-time placement outside the main
building.
He
has held faculty positions at National College in Evanston, Illinois and
Shippensburg University in Pennsylvania where he taught students studying for
both Master’s degrees and state certification. Prior to his retirement, he
taught gifted elementary students in a ‘pull-out’ program. He is currently
retired and continues his love of travel. To date he has visited 22 countries
where he developed meaningful and lasting friendships with people in differing
settings throughout the world.
Amazon:
https://www.amazon.com/Secrets-Gay-Man-Growing-1950s/dp/1614688540/ref=sr_1_1
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
GIVEAWAY INFORMATION and RAFFLECOPTER
CODE
PLEASE
MENTION THE PRIZE THAT THE AUTHOR WILL BE GIVING AWAY:
Jonathan
Feinn will be awarding a $25 Amazon/BN gift card to a randomly drawn winner
Please
use this rafflecopter code on your post:
<a
class="rcptr" href="http://www.rafflecopter.com/rafl/display/28e4345f4819/"
rel="nofollow" data-raflid="28e4345f4819"
data-theme="classic" data-template=""
id="rcwidget_dlfhthhu">a Rafflecopter giveaway</a>
<script
src="https://widget-prime.rafflecopter.com/launch.js"></script>
If
you’re unable to embed, please use this HTML:
<a
href="http://www.rafflecopter.com/rafl/display/28e4345f4819/">Enter
to win a $25 Amazon/BN GC - a Rafflecopter giveaway</a>
Neither of my
grandparents spoke English but were fluent in Russian and Yiddish. They
parented five sons one of whom had a very serious dysfluency and was thought to
be retarded. Given the lack of
understanding and resources during his early childhood, he never received any
specific help and suffered throughout his life from emotional problems. I don’t
remember having much connection to him, but I was aware that Uncle Joe felt
rejection from my father who was a lawyer and the youngest brother who was a
doctor. I remember feeling, frightened as a young child when my father would
yell at him. The oldest son was married and already had a son when I was born.
Three of the
uncles lived in an apartment with my grandparents above ours in a two flat
building. There was much tension between the brothers and throughout my
childhood I have memories of yelling and screaming fights between the brothers.
I felt somewhat closer to my uncle Jack who I remember sitting me on his lap
when I was a young child and singing to me; ’Thai Thai tiddly tum’ I remember
feeling safe with him.
Looking back,
I realize my paternal grandparents were depressed. I never saw them
affectionate with one another. Grandma Sonia had been raised in a family in
Moscow with some financial means and had opportunities to be educated in the
arts and dancing. My grandfather came from a religious but impoverished family
in Odessa. Neither grandparent ever shared anything with me about their lives
in Europe which saddens me. I realize how difficult and painful it would have
been for them and of course, there was the language problem. From time to time
when my parents were out for the evening my grandfather would be my
‘babysitter’. I was told when I grew older that one night when Grandpa Zelig
was the sitter, my parents returned and found him fast asleep and snoring while
I was up playing with my toys.
My parents
spoke to my grandparents in Yiddish and as a child I wanted to understand what
they were saying. Over time I began to develop a beginning understanding of Yiddish
and knew a few expressions which I tried to speak to my grandfather. He would always say ‘You American boy. NO
speak Yiddish.’ In my adult years, I
regret a missed opportunity to become a competent Yiddish speaker.
How difficult
it must have been for my grandfather to support the family on a fish peddler’s
income though the war years were hard financially for most people including my
parents; my father did provide financial help to my grandparents in addition to
supporting the four of us. Meanwhile grandmother Sonia Sarah had to adjust
mealtimes to each of her son’s different schedules and preferences. She was
very protective of her disabled son and on her death-bed begged family members
to promise to care for him, Despite my uncle’s disability, he was able to work
and live an independent life eventually getting married.
Thank you for hosting today.
ReplyDeleteI would reading this book.
ReplyDeleteSounds like a really good read.
ReplyDelete